Tag Archives: divorce

Dreams Unrequited Love Poem

Posted on by under Poetry 
Dreams

I've seen you in my dreams
splitting through the seams
I've sewed, trying to keep you out.
Pressing play on the same ol' scenes
of what was like a movie classic stuck on loop,
even though I've already swept you from my stoop.
Yet, my dreams teleport my heart
upon this ragged, wooden sloop -
a prison you made for me.
Still stuck upon this sea
with sails that only catch your wind,
a sailor bound in captivity.
I've lost fear of drowning
but feel like I'm burning
beneath a sweltering sun
and despite this intense yearning
for a drink of your waters
my heart knows our tale is done.
Wake up my sleeping heart!
Awake and don't depart!
To resist the reins of impossibility
is a painfully learned art.

Justin Farley

Hello, everyone! I have recently published my first chapbook of Christian poems titled “A Voice in the Wilderness – A Chapbook of Poems about God”. This has been developed and polished over the past six months or so. I am happy with the final product and hope you find encouragement in the poems but also a validation that the spiritual life is not all sunshine and rainbows. We all struggle. We all have periods of questions and/or doubt. But it is the yearning that keeps us coming back for more and allows us to experience joy.
You can purchase either on Amazon or on my own bookstore (it is cheaper and has free shipping on my store) and is available on the Kindle and in paperback.
Amazon: Kindle Paperback
Inkspiration Books (my bookstore): Paperback
Thank you for your support!

Looking For Eternal Love Poem – “The Wings of A Fighter”

Posted on by under Poetry

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The Wings of A Fighter – A Poem About Looking For Eternal Love

I’m looking for the wings of a fighter,
someone to take flight with
and who won’t turn back at the slightest breeze.
She need not be perfect and can have scars upon her,
she just must be resistant to whatever weather fortune brings.

I’m done floating on delicate bubbles,
quickly rising, but eager to pop.
I’m done dealing with skyline struggles,
pleading and begging just to keep from being dropped.

I’m looking for the wings of a fighter,
she may be bruised but absorbs life’s punches
without letting go of my hand.
When she’s afraid she clutches me tighter,
and her promises are solid ground, not suddenly swallowed by sand.

I’m done flying with fallen angels
who fiercely hold onto pride and careless ways.
I’m done rebuilding and mending halos
only to find they have no desire to reenter heaven’s gates.

I’m looking for the wings of a fighter
with feathers secure and ready for flight.
Someone who is not merely a glider,
but a partner who flaps her wings beside me,
raging and resisting against the black of night.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

About the Poem

A poem about looking for eternal love and finding a partner who is dedicated and sticks by your side through life’s struggles.

photo credit: Alter ego via photopin (license)

The Clouds of Mourning – A Poem About Depression and Pain

Posted on by under Mental Health, Personal Development, Poetry, Uncategorized

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As we go through life, there are inevitable seasons where it seems the skies are always cloudy, always raining, and the forecast will never change. Anyone that has ever dealt with depression (or any mental illness for that matter) knows that it is like a ghost that haunts you no matter where you go or how hard you try to hide from it. Fight all you want, but you can never defeat the forces of darkness with strength alone. In these times of darkness and pain, how do we keep moving forward? How do we resist the temptation to give up and let the pain of life suck everything from our soul?

Typically, telling yourself to “cheer up”, “suck it up”, “pick yourself up”, or having someone else tell you to stop feeling sorry for yourself only makes matters worse, and I believe does a disservice to our heart. Deep depression is not an easy thing to fix, and the reality is that sometimes there are circumstances in our lives where the only appropriate response is to mourn and cry. And sometimes we need that time to just embrace the issue and recognize that it is ok to feel pain. But how do we not drown in that pain?

I believe the only way we can move forward is by grasping hope and refusing to let go. It might not get better today, it might not be tomorrow, but as long as there is hope that things will get better, the ghosts of depression are unable to penetrate our locked doors and totally possess us.

The Clouds of Mourning – A Poem About Depression and Pain

The clouds of mourning
Hang and hover over me
Like ghosts – translucent,
Yet allowing only darkness to pass through.
Their pale gray sheets flap and flutter
In the breezes of life,
Dimming and drowning out
All traces of light.
Their wails send nails
Falling from the sky,
Raining down and driving like hammers;
Pounding their melancholic clamors into my heart.

My palette is stained,
Soaked in ashen gray paint.
Non-washable, permanent and persistent;
Resistant to the colors I attempt to cover with my brush.
The clouds of mourning
Flood my skies like ghastly Dementors,
Following me through the hours
And sucking at my soul one minute at a time.

Sweet angels,
Have you lost the fight to the terrors?
Have your hallowed halos burnt out like smoking embers
And lost their luster and glow?
Where are you hiding
In this dark and stormy night?
Where are your shields and swords,
Why are you overwhelmed by the demons of darkness,
Why do you refuse to fight?

What weapons do I pick up
To fend off forces invisible and invincible?
Is there an amulet I can hang over my heart to keep out
The ghouls that pass uninhibited through locked doors?
The icy rain covers my window pane
In sheets of tears running down in streams of solitude.
Winter’s wrath bars my path
And leaves me shivering in the cold wondering what to do.
The clouds of mourning
Hang and hover over me
Like ghosts – translucent,
But hope shall be my exorcism.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

 

photo credit: Titanic via photopin (license)

Leaving Home – A Love Poem About Rejection and Starting Over 

Posted on by under Poetry

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Leaving Home – A Poem About Getting Rejected by a Lover

Leaving home and venturing alone
Out across the unfamiliar frontier.
The scenery and signposts are all unknown,
And my heart sags, burdened by hesitation and fear.

Traveling along tomorrow’s highway,
Musing over the miles left behind.
But when you’ve played every card there is to play,
Your eviction notice has been signed.

It’s no easy task to pack up the memories,
Pile your bags high with hopes of what you thought would be.
But when your heart is denied all entries,
It’s clear you’ve been rejected, not set free.

So now one set of footprints mark the journey
Where there once were two.
This road has become winding and curvy
At the thought of starting something new.

But I have no regrets nor reservations;
I did all that I could do.
I’m just weighted down by a trunk filled with frustrations
That I was not worth the fight for you.

I’ll travel on,
Knowing there’s an exit within my sight.
But my heart still worries how you’ll get along
Through your dark and arduous night.

My only concern is for your poor heart –
So blind and was never able to see.
I would have held your hand tightly through the dark,
But instead you’ve settled for misery.

Leaving home and venturing alone,
Determined to not let fear decide my fate.
Far better to blaze a path into the unknown
Than to remain comfortable and stagnate.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

photo credit: Iceland Highways via photopin (license)

Betrayal Burns Like A Bonfire – A Poem of Love

Posted on by under Poetry

bonfire at night

Betrayal Burns Like A Bonfire – A Poem of Love

My heart is burning in the flames of betrayal –
Scorching like a fiery furnace stripping away metal,
Bubbling like a boiling brew over a kettle;
Anguish stirs within.

Oh, this wretched weakness, this bitter sin
That I allow my anger to smolder.
Steam sneaks out from beneath my nostrils.
I take the form of an angry dragon
With rigid, hard scales unable to be penetrated,
Trying to keep my lips closed and the flames contained
Within the confines of my belly.

Am I wounded by pride or jealously?
Honestly, I can’t tell.
It is this unwrapping that I’m dog-tired of,
Grown so weary of that I have a hard time
Picking back up the pieces of my shattered heart once more,
Fatigued by unraveling my spirit across the table to be viewed by another,
Only to have it trampled on upon the floor.

It is not even love alone that troubles me –
It is the human race.
So carelessly putting masks on their face
And acting out roles from plays
Their hearts were never meant to play,
Spewing out vomit of promises and passions
Without meaning a single word they say.

Maybe I’m just some alien invader never meant to live on planet Earth,
But for me, words have worth.
I am not interested in playing love,
Not interested in distributing new robes to try,
New parts to play like backyard kids.
I am only interested in doing love,
Of transcending the feeling of love
And ascending to acting love –
To love with all my heart and soul,
To patch the wounds and holes of another,
And to do whatever love requires to see it grow.

Surely, I am not alone!
Surely, there’s another willing to put in the work love requires!
One that doesn’t regard it to be a piece of trash to be discarded
After the initial infatuation date expires.

But where are you, Love?
Where are you, Truth?
You have been lost among the pages of this generation’s youth,
Who demands to eat their desires without working to see them grow –
So willing to reap, but so unwilling to sow;
This generation who is always on the go,
Looking for another quick fix for the restlessness
They harbor within their soul.

But the emptiness remains.
The emptiness that stirs the heart to look for another name
To hope in, to trust in for happiness and fulfillment.
But love was never meant to be a cure all for life’s woes.
But I suppose we’ve lost that too…
Morality is more than we can chew,
So we spit it out and are guided by our own intuition.
Chaos reigns supreme in the prideful heart –
Freedom has heavier chains than the most guarded prison.

So how do I let myself fall into the arms of another
When each one before this has sat back and watched as I’ve fallen on my face,
Sat back and sneered, cheered as I’m betrayed?
How do you still the child’s whisper in your ear
That lies will once again be uncovered, that you will once again discover
That they are just like all the rest,
Breathing without a beating heart in their chest,
But only a black, withered clump of coal
Who cares for you only as long as you can make them feel whole?

Betrayal burns like a bonfire,
And I’m not sure if I can put it out.
Or even want to for that matter…
So rage on sweet anger.
Burn with a fire so hot that it removes any longing
To pull this heart from my chest again.
Let me lie in lonely lullabies.
Let me dwell alone beneath the shadow of hillsides –
For solitude has its peace.
Let me rest in the quiet of isolation until I meet Truth on the street.
I’ve been so yearning to meet her.
I’ve danced with those who’ve pretended to wear her face,
But the bitter after-taste of their sweet kiss was only lies.
Oh, Truth, I’m calling to you.
Dear, if you can hear me now, won’t you answer my cry?

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

photo credit: Torrington Cavalier Bonfire 2005 via photopin (license)

The Streets of Love – A Poem

Posted on by under Poetry

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The Streets of Love – A Poem

Somewhere in the depths of solitude
There’s a searching, a seeking,
An endless pursuit for meaning
Among the daily rendezvous with silence
And the lonely morning hangovers
From drinking too many shots of unrequited love
The night before.
There’s Tylenol for a headache,
but what do I give my heart?
How do I treat this pain
From parading down Main Street
Putting on my best show every night,
Yet only performing to empty streets
And vacant sidewalks?

Once upon a time I wished upon stars
But the veil of darkness has smothered their glow.
Night is now a cosmic sea of black waters galaxies deep.
No longer is hope revived after hours of sleep,
But staggers out of bed like a wounded soldier
With an ailment that has gone untreated.
My hope is not yet defeated,
But is down to its last stand
And is backed into a corner of surrender.

Somehow it seems my time has passed.
I feel like the school boy who wakes up late
And misses the bus, sprinting out just in time
To see it carry his classmates away.
I stayed at home the day the rest mingled and played,
Discovering their partners.
Love has swished me around in its gullet on more than one occasion,
But refuses to swallow, hacking me up and spitting me out again
To wallow in the remnants of its saliva and digestion.
Is my taste not sweet enough?
Or am I missing some tang?
My heart is burdened by the pangs of rejection.

I do not need another to define me,
But my masculine desires rage within my loins
And seek fulfillment and release.
Until this need is satisfied
I am afraid inner peace is out of reach.
Naked. Starving. Ravenous.
My hunger feasts upon my thoughts.

I am lost in this lonely night
And trek across the land
Hoping to find another unfortunate soul like mine.
I yearn for intimacy –
To taste a feminine spirit and savor her juices on my tongue.
But now I lie among the vagabonds and migrant drifters
With endless winters that leave me without shelter and cold,
Shuffling alone through sleepy towns and foreign lands
Searching for a home wherever I can find it.

But cardboard boxes and bridge overpasses
Are no place for relief and asylum
From the weather of the world.
There is still faith that one day I can unpack my suitcase
For the last time and warm myself
By the hearth of another’s heart.
But until then I remain homeless –
A hopeless romantic just trying to survive
Living on the streets of love.

-Poem Written By Justin Farley

If you enjoyed this post, I would greatly appreciate it if you like, share, or comment on it. Follow my blog to receive notifications when new posts are published. You can find my other Christian poems, Lent poems, love poems or inspirational poems at https://alongthebarrenroad.com/category/poetry/

photo credit: via dei funari 2 via photopin (license)

Love and Lust – A Poem

Posted on by under Personal Development, Poetry

marriage

Love and Lust

Love is an ancient art –
A forgotten antiquity endangered
And on the verge of extinction.

We’ve traded real commitment
For one night stands.
A lifetime friend and partner
For someone willing to let us use them
To satisfy our demands.

Love has become a carnival of lust,
Where feelings control our loyalty,
And we go frolicking through the night
Hopping from ride to ride.

A superstore for selfish desires,
Where we walk down the aisles filling our carts
And shop assured that all products
Can be returned whenever they lose their usefulness.

The media sells love as a stormy passion,
Whipping around the mystery guy or girl,
Where it’s ok to discover their body
Before their heart, yet we weep
And ask, “why me?” when we’re abandoned.

And it’s not fair that you
Should have to control your sexual longing.
One time’s not going to hurt anyone
And you deserve this

Until you have to explain
To your young child why Mommy and Daddy
Aren’t going to be living happily ever after anymore
Because he couldn’t keep it in his pants
Or she couldn’t keep her legs closed.

Our disposable culture
Has trickled down to our relationships,
Ready to upgrade our contracts
Whenever our current one isn’t meeting our needs.

“Until Death Do Us Part”
Has become “Until I Find Someone Better”
or “Until You Lose Your Usefulness”.

We look for love in porn flicks
And under the cover of steamy erotic novels
And get just what we seek out –
A chaotic compilation of broken hearts,
Broken promises, single mothers, and broken families.

The media’s selling it,
And we’re buying
Because our lives are so void of meaning
That we’re willing to do anything to feel again.

We’ve realized expensive toys won’t buy happiness,
But rather than investigating the truth,
We turn our fragile hearts to fantasy,
Thinking it can fill the gaping hole in our hearts
That won’t stop letting in the pain.

Love is not a Velcro strip
You attach when feelings are running high,
Ready to rip it free
The second those feelings die.

It’s a cement bond
That you choose to be molded in,
Cast enclosed with your lover
Through thick and thin,

When seas are calm,
And when the waves crash and roll.
When two people’s lives are stable
And when life leaves you out of control.

Love is not the pretty beauty queen
That you wanted to show off at prom,
But the one you want by your side
When you go to war,
Trusting your life and care in their arms.

The biggest lie is believing
That when we find “the One”
The feelings will never fade.

Feelings are fleeting.
They rise and fall like the sun in the sky.
Love is an act of putting another first –
A surrendering of pride.

But we’ve forgotten how to be servants
And only desire to be served.
We want to be loved,
But don’t want to love.

Because to love means that you’re ok
With being vulnerable.
You place your heart in someone’s hands
And you do your part regardless if they do theirs.

Culture calls that weak,
That we must never open ourselves to pain,
Which is why it’s filled with pessimists,
Safe, caged, and constantly feeling a longing
For something outside of their grasp and understanding.

And it’s the reason they sell lust and not love,
Because love is too scary and real for them,
Because true love is not about fulfilling selfish desires,
But selflessly fulfilling and serving another.

The foundation of love is servanthood.
Unless you lay down the cornerstone,
You’re going to be living under one shaky roof.

– Poem Written by Justin Farley

 

Photo Credit: @yakobusan Jakob Montrasio 孟亚柯 via Compfight cc

Lovers and Friends – A Poem

Posted on by under Poetry

Can we stop, start it over
and reintroduce ourselves as friends?
Let the past harden like cooled, charred lava
embrace each other and make amends?

Can we leave love’s story untold –
leave the unwritten verses in our minds?
Let indifference swallow them up
and scatter them beneath the sands of time?

Can former lovers embrace without evoking
a familiar feeling and saliva on the tongue?
Restrain from a feast of memories preserved
from when you and I were young?

Can we draw the dangling curtains close,
realign the stage and clear the set?
Quickly change our costumes and clothes,
put on a new play, and learn to forget?

Can we mute the muffled musings
our hearts beat within our breasts?
Escort each other from familiar quarters
and greet each other as guests?

Can we walk the sidewalk beside the city street
and shield ourselves from Cupid’s stare?
Ignore the past echoing off the souls of our feet
and convince ourselves we no longer care?

Is there a chance at rearranging
the odd-shaped puzzle pieces of our lives?
Or will we always remain locked as corner pieces,
trying to fight our way back inside?

I could supply you with a dose of honesty,
but the poison would certainly spoil the taste.
So I’ll just say I can handle “friends”
and pretend you can be replaced.