Losing Myself Poem About Mental Illness and Recovery

Losing Myself

I’m losing myself in pieces –
every year fragments of my soul
feel swept away by time.

My identity constantly decreases,
and I’m beginning to feel like a stranger
within the confines of my own mind.

Yes, I’m losing myself in pieces –
the jigsaw puzzle’s lovely image
has jumbled into an abstract mess.

But my search for meaning never ceases.
I continue holding the lantern,
calling out to myself in the darkness.

I’m searching for the lost pieces –
putting myself back together
one discovery at a time.

With faith, hope increases,
and despite being far from perfect,
I’m able to begin recovery’s climb.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

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Poem about Wrestling with God and Accepting God’s Will

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Tug O’ War

Engaged in a constant game
of tug o’ war between your will and mine.
Sweating out the hours.
Eking out the days,
muscles bulging in desperate exhaustion,
clinging to dust.

Why do I wrestle with you?
Why does my foolish heart
still insist it knows better
despite a lifelong record of defeat?

Because I’m a sinner,
flawed at the deepest depths of my core.
But despite my imperfection
you lovingly continue to play the game
even though you could pull my will
right out of my hands at any moment you choose.

And yet you don’t let go of the rope either.
You patiently keep tugging at my heart
until the day I willingly choose
to let go of my will
and take a hold of yours.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

Poem About Addiction to Drugs Alcohol and Recovery

Starting Today

If resisting was an easy task,
who would be a slave?
Who would part with a piece of themselves
for the chance at an early grave?
Willpower alone is enough to put you in hell
but not enough to pull you out.
You’ll never have a chance at getting well
until you accept living by a different route.
If change is what you want,
you’ll have to change much about you.
You’ll have to learn to become humble
and do what trusted advisers tell you to do.
The road is long and hard
but worth every step of the way
because you have the opportunity
to be free again starting today.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

Poem about Books, Magic, and Magical Places

Magic

I’ve experienced magic.
I’ve witnessed countless spells
and drank the words of a thousand potions.

Been teleported to different countries and worlds,
explored to the end of the universe,
have dug to the center of Earth,
and have even traveled through time.

I’ve ridden horses through ancient forests,
stormed and conquered a fortress,
and have warmed my bones beside the fire
in the depths of castle walls.

I’ve captained a pirates’ ship,
worn a pistol on my hip,
and plundered enough treasure
to awe even the richest of men.

I know what it’s like to look up at a T-Rex.
I’ve felt the heat of a dragon’s breath.
And on the rare occasion,
I’ve even gazed upon the beauty of a unicorn.

Yes, I’ve experienced magic.
And still get swept away by its incantations
because I possess the power to read.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

“Books are a uniquely portable magic.” – Stephen King

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Poem about Depression, Anxiety, and Bipolar Disorder

Wavering Emotions

What pulls me out of bed in the morning?
What lies beyond the break of day?
Some days find me bouncing to work,
others a struggle to summon the energy to play.

How do I slay this elusive dragon
that renders me depressed and without drive?
My heart longs and desires to flourish,
but my mind is merely trying to survive.

There’s scenes of prosperity
but always followed by a pauper’s act.
My heart always seems to know where it’s going,
but my mind constantly derails me off the tracks.

How do I muzzle the black dog’s barking?
How do I train him to submit by my side?
Some days find me rejoicing at life’s invitation,
others a constant desire to lock my doors and hide.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

Poem About Babies and Parenthood

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Parental Love

Days spent thinking about
all the things I want to teach you
all the things I can’t wait to show you
but for now it’s fishing for your smiles
like twinkling stars in my sky
that I want to catch
and hold in my pocket forever.
How can something so small, so innocent, so powerless
simultaneously possess the power
to suspend time in a parent’s world?

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

Poem About Peace, Love, and Faith

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You Will Find

You will find peace
when nothing but this moment matters…
when you forgive yourself and others for the past
and stop obsessing over the worries of tomorrow.

You will find contentment
when you seek communion with the divine…
when the eternal fire of truth burns brighter
than wealth, social status, or material possessions.

You will find love
when you become loving…
when you live outside yourself
and believe there’s worse things than a broken heart.

You will find joy
when you purposefully seek it…
when you silence your complaints
and paint your gratitude upon each morning.

And you will find faith
when you dare to dream again…
when you see the world with your heart
and witness the pulsating beauty of possibility all around you.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

Poem About the Grace and Mercy of God

The Questions of Life

Are we free or predetermined?
At the helm of the open seas
or merely indentured servants?
Why the trials, why the burdens
if life is as it’s meant to be,
if the future is certain?
But as for me, I’m determined
to believe that freewill
is your loving flame for us burning.
For without it grace becomes a meaningless word
instead of a powerful, raging current
instead of a powerful, raging current.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley

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How Anxiety Distracts Us From God

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 The Noticer

Let me be a noticer of things in your world
instead of a dweller of my inner thoughts,
worries, and selfish longings
that only keep me distracted from you.

For when I uproot myself out of the present moment
and plant my focus on myself,
I rob myself of the joy
of witnessing your glory and beauty
all around me.

I have always been a highly observant person, picking out minor details that others often miss. On my morning walk in the woods today I noticed an old, wooden beam with rusted barbwire wrapped around the edges that had clearly once been a fence post. The problem was that I’d walked this path dozens of times before. Worse, it only stood a few inches off the trail.

What may seem an unimportant observation worried me. I should have noticed this a long time ago. But then again, maybe I’m not quite as observant as I once was…not since anxiety and worry have become a constant companion.

I sat there looking at that fence post, noticing for the first time the rotting wood and the crumbling decay of age. In my perifocal view I then noticed a bee hovering around a flower and insects crawling along the earth. I was struck with the realization that I have formed a habit of being so stuck inside my head observing my anxieties and worries that I have lost an awareness of the world around me.

I’ve decided I’m still a highly observant person; I’ve just been preoccupied with the wrong details. Anxiety and worry cause us to retreat inward, focusing on only our thoughts and feelings, preparing for the “what ifs” of the future. In the process they rob us of the joy and experience of life in the present moment.

God dwells in the here and now. God speaks in the present. God walks with us in this moment. When we try to place ourselves in the future, we make no room for God. For the future is determined by His will, not ours. And that is what anxiety and fear inspire us to do, don’t they? To just sprint past God and try to prepare, plan, and control what happens next. We lack faith in God’s providence, so we seek out our own providence. We are finite creatures who are not built to withstand that kind of responsibility. When we put ourselves in control of managing our future, we collapse under the weight of worry.

Even more importantly, when we are constantly distracted by our worries and removed from the here and now, we miss out on the wonderful experience of witnessing God’s glory and beauty all around us.  The beauty of a sunset, the feeling of the wind against your skin, the magic of the leaves changing colors, the love in another’s eyes, the wisdom God passes on in seemingly unimportant things.

It’s a hard fight to pull yourself out of your own head and leave all the worrying behind. It’s maybe an even harder fight to trust in God. But there are opportunities for redemption all around us, yet we have to be attentive to the present moment to recognize them. If we remain focused on the incessant cycle of self-centered thoughts, we deny ourselves the gift of seeing God’s divine presence right here, right now.

-Post and Poem Written by Justin Farley

Trusting in God Instead of Your Understanding Poem

Be My Vision

 

Be the eyes through
which I see –
so that I may not gaze
into the past with regret
or worry about what’s before me.

In past, present, and future
let me only see you and your will.

May I not be obsessed with
the weather in my life –
so that I trust in your love
whether the sun is shinning
or I’m alone in the dark of night.

In joy, pain, and in the plain
you remain utterly in control.

Let it be your will
that I’m planning –
so that I’m not tossed
off-course by human vision
and lean on my own understanding.

I’m powerless to understand your thoughts and ways.
Let me just rest, assured in your love.

-Poem Written by Justin Farley