I plucked the pieces of forbidden fruit
and bit into them, ravished by their taste –
devouring the memories my mind
had shielded me from for far too long.
They tasted sweet on the tongue,
left me reminiscing for the days when I was young,
but lingered too long and became bitter –
the winter of my years and life,
so far from who I once was,
days before I was taken under the knife,
the knife that cut me wide open and laid me
vulnerable on the operating table,
making me less human that I already was
like a grotesque monster created among
the darkened shadows of moonlight
thrown across Dr. Frankenstein’s laboratory.
I find myself so far disconnected from the man and child
who exists only in my memories,
that I have to squint and rub my glasses clean
just to recognize my face.
It’s been too long since I’ve walked
among Eden’s garden, strolled careless without burden
and absorbed the crisp, warm rays of the sun.
For now I stand outside Eden’s gates,
dueling with the flaming sword,
destined to lose and damned to forever
gaze into the garden and remember its beauty.
I’ve been a captive for too long…
I forget what it’s like to feel free –
to steer my ship into whichever harbor I choose,
to run playfully in the summer breeze
without being tripped or weighed down
by the shackles gripped tight around my feet –
the chains that bind and secure defeat,
defeat who grooms her hair
and presses out the wrinkles in her dress
preparing me before my date with despair.
But I remember the old days,
even if I need to wipe away
the dust to read their dates.
The beauty of life is that it’s never too late
to resist the winds of mighty gales
and the undertow of surging currents
and shake your fists at fate,
one determined day at a time.